Last night I watched one of the most disgusting and stomach churning movie I've ever seen. Dumplings, one of the so-called "Asia Extreme" movies that have been getting a lot of recent attention here in the States, is stunning to look at and has an enjoyably campy and operatic plot.
But director Fruit Chan really doesn't know when to stop. The plot? From IMDB.com:
To remain beautiful and young, a woman embarks in a sick and disgusting [quest] for a repugnant menu.
Unlike recent "torture porn" flicks that also push the boundaries of violence and gore, Dumplings doesn't implicate the viewer in the action--fortunately. You might lose your lunch anyway.
J.J. Abrams Cloverfield phenomenon has mushroomed out of control. It's everywhere, even on VH1--the channel for shortbus hipsters to lazy too actually be cool. If you haven't seen the trailer, it's here. And don't forget the weird/dumb movie website with the moveable photos. Do a Google search if you want to see theories, fake websites, predictions, parodies, et al. Survey says: Fanboy wet dream.
David Duchoveny claims there is a second X-Files movie in the works. Please, let it be so. And please, let it not suck.
Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! was broadcast on the TCM cable channel last week. Outstanding. Even better was the post-movie chat between Robert Osborne and Tod Oldham. Hilarious--especially Osborne's face when Oldham compared the Russ Meyer gem to Citizen Kane with nary a whisper of irony.
A few days ago, I provided a tepid review of the Masters of Horror television series on Showtime. I stand by that post. However, I just watched Joe Dante's second season entry, "The Screwfly Solution", and must say it bordered on genius. In fact, I'd say it was fantastic until the surprise ending, which--though cool and appropriate for the genre--sort of demoted the movie into just another SF narrative. For most episodes, that would be step up. But Dante is showing that maybe the limitations of the small screen are just what he needs. His first season show "Homecoming" is still the best so far.
His latest episode did include the single creepiest image in the entire series: A billboard of a woman in a bathing suit vandalized to look like she's wearing a burka. In the context of the plot, it was shocking in that it's not entirely unbelievable for our red state brothers.
Finally, if the masters are too scary for you, check this: The Amateurs of Horror and their tale of Douglas the Zombie.
I've been a fan of horror movies since I crept downstairs to watch Fantastic Voyage on my family's new color TV at the age of six. From that time on, I would watch anything, as long it was supposed to be scary or weird or gross. It's been a habit that's hard to break.
Showtime's Master of Horror series would seem to be right up my ally: A-list horror directors allowed to direct whatever they wanted with no restrictions. Except most aren't A-list directors. And there are restrictions. And most were only OK. So what went wrong?
Most of these guys are--unfortunately--past their prime. It happens to everyone. But those who work in the horror genre get hit especially hard. The empathy that comes with age really fucks with one's ability to be transgressive. For example, how many adults hit frogs with baseball bats? Why it that? Now you know why Land of the Dead lacks the bite of Dawn of the Dead.
Most of these guys need restrictions--of time, of budget, of talent--to be creative. Their best work lives in the cracks and subtext of their material. When you can do and show any and every thing, the mystery evaporates.
It is virtually impossible to be scary in one hour. Horror requires rhythm. Establishing rhythm in a hour takes a level of narrative skill these guys just don't have.
Still, some of these master still have the horror in them. Joe Dante's zombie satire Homecoming transcends as both a movie and political rant. Dario Argento heads into psychosexual territory, but ultimately pulls his punches in Jenifer. And Don Coscarelli of Phantasm fame almost hits a homerun with Incident on and off and Mountain Road--but monster design sinks this one fast.
The six-year-old in me hasn't given up. The 44-year-old, on the other hand, is keeping one finger on the remote.
BTW, one thing Masters of Horror does extremely well is start each episode with this inventive and creepy intro.
This happily married homosexual roams the streets of Washington, DC, looking for beauty, joy, and truth. What he finds is shocking--just shocking. His motto: Open minded does not mean unopinionated. Talk to me.
